Monday, January 24, 2011

haven't been around

Sorry I haven't been keeping up with my blogging duties. I have many things to talk about but I am finding out people are reading my blog and then using things I say against me within my family. So I have decided to focus on things that don't have to do with my personal life that people can mistrue and get defensive about. That makes me sad because I always felt like this was a safe place for me to talk and if family chose to read it they would realize this was my avenue to vent and talk and exercise my right of free speech, and be myself but I am quite tired of the toxicity within my family right now. Some times family can be as toxic as trying to be perfect. I am tired of people who claim to know me trying to change me. Telling me how to act, how to be what they want me to be, how I was a disappointment to them, that they know more than me on every subject whether they honestly do. But to try and advice them is like entering the center of a hurricane and I become the worst person on earth.

Therefor while I will continue to talk about my kids, becoming Gluten Free, vacations, etc. My private life info is going to be off limits because I have found that I am honestly not free to be me. Censorship is a bad thing It is sad that "family" tends to judge the harshest even when they have no clue what is actually going on in my life. Judgement is not love but then I really wonder what family love and support look like these days.

1 comment:

Campbell said...

I know that it is harder to live than it is to say, but know this:

They don't have a clue.
You don't owe them ANY explanations.

You don't need or require theirs or anyone's permission to BE YOURSELF.

And if they don't like it, tell them to have a coke and a smile and shut the FFFF up!

love ya,

Anna