This is me for the next couple nights. 2 and a wake up!!!!
Thursday, December 23, 2010
So after I made that last post I was sitting here in a funk. All of a sudden, outside I hear lots of laughter and then singing. There was a group of kids going down the middle of the street and stopping from time to time all the while singing Christmas Carols. The stopped in front our house and Drew and I watched out the upstairs window. All of a sudden, they started singing my mom's favorite Christmas song. The Christmas Song Never in the three years have we been here has this happened. Never in the three years that we have been here have I been in such a funk.
I know many people don't believe in such but I took it as a sign that my mom was here and that it was all going to be ok. For a minute I felt her next to Drew and I, holding my hand, singing along.
I miss you Mommy. Merry Christmas
There are lots of days I miss my mom and grandparents, today is one of two that I miss my mom it hurts like it was yesterday that she passed away.
Christmas was my mom's holiday. To her it meant family, love, time together, to be thankful for all we had. It just doesn't feel like Christmas. Living in California is hard during the holidays. It is not cold, there is no snow, there is no family except the three of us. This year it is worse because Phil is not here.
When I was a kid, we would always spend Christmas Eve going out to dinner with our grandparents. Some times if the weather was bad we would order pizza. Several years mom would boil shrimp and we would have a feast. Then back to our house to open Christmas presents from each other. My dad always called it conspicuous consumption. It usually did look like a wrapping paper factory threw up when the chaos was over. After we went to bed, Santa would come. After waking mom and dad up at ugly early and checking out the loot, mom and dad would go back to bed. When they were finally up there was flurry of activity as mom started cooking Christmas dinner. My grandparents would come over and some years my dad's other relatives from Hiawatha would join us. My dad was a firm believer that kids needed to be in their own environment during Christmas because it was a such a confusing chaotic time for them and being in their own home allowed some sense of normal routine.
I have tried to recreate the Christmas of years past. I have realized that is not possible. I can never be my mom. All I can do is remind my children of the meaning of family and when all else fails all we have is each other.
As we got older my mom became more of a Christmas fanatic. It would take a weekend to put up and decorate the tree. My parents best friends the Hazlett's would trek to Kansas city the day ofter Thanksgiving and start the process. I know there was one year that dad and Allan held the tree up while mom and Peggy rushed out to get fishing wire to string up the top part of the tree. I always felt safe and warm during Christmas. While we didn't do lots of baking and such, it was still my family and my traditions. I miss my family in Kansas. I wish many things could be different. I wish the closeness of the holidays was still present in all of us. I cherish those memories of Christmas' past. Sometimes I feel like it is all I have left.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Scott and I have to make a rough decision tonight. To some this might not sound hard but to us it was trying to hold on to our youngest sons childhood just a bit longer.
My dad does a wonderful service every year. He calls kids all over the country to help Santa check in on kids. I think last year he said he had 30 kids on his list. He has wonderful sleigh bells. He loves doing it and kids all over the country have a bit of magic during their holiday.
Dad offered to put Drew on his list this year. After much discussion Scott and I decided to decline. Drew is getting very good at discerning voices. He can tell when the same person plays different characters in movies. He knows who Steve Carrel is and knows what movies he has animated for example. Drew talks to my dad on a regular basis and we were worried that he might recognize the voice.
Drew has been questioning the reality of Santa vs the meaning of Santa lately. We have a Shelf Elf and the other Drew asked me if I would ever lie to him. I said not intentionally. He asked if I realized that Shelf Elf was plastic and why didn't he ever blink. HMMMMM.
We want this last year of belief for our own selfish reasons. We aren't sure if he as grasp what Santa is all about so we are holding our breath. I think the belief has lasted this long because he has been homeschooled. After this year I am sure we will be having discussions about Yes Virgina and what Santa is all about.
My youngest is growing up. I am glad we have had this long.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Last was was a rare celestial event. It was a lunar eclipse that happened on winter solstice. This event has not happened in over 300 years. Pretty spectacular if you ask me. Drew on the other hand....
Scott came to bed about 1130. I woke up and decided we all needed to trek into the backyard and witness this event of historical proportion. So Scott woke up Drew and asked if he wanted to see it. Drew was up in an instant. He was so excited. We all went the the back yard - there was a break in the rain so we could actually see the moon. It was at about half covered. I explained to drew the significance of this event. He seemed duly impressed. After watching for a few minutes we all went back in.
I asked Andrew if he wanted me to wake him up in a couple hours so he could see the full lunar eclipse. "No thanks mom, once you have seen one lunar eclipse you have seen them all. I would prefer to sleep."
So much for being impressed.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Today Drew and I were at Henry's Farmer's Market. I had to pick up a few things. We were waiting at the meat counter and Drew was begging to stand on the cart. Being 70 pounds that is not a good idea so I told him no because it would tip the cart. After several attempt to change my mind he asked why not when other kids were allowed to do it. I replied that "I guess I am a mean mom" At that point I dropped my phone. Drew looked at me, shook his head and said "karma" and walked over to pick up bananas.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Well I finished my Christma shopping today. My friend Lori and I have begun a tradition (we are in our second year) of taking a day going out for Chinese lunch and then finishing up our shopping. More than anything it is a day just to hang out and talk. We wander thru the stores and finish stocking stuffers and a few impulse buys for the kids. What is Christmas with out impulse buys?
On the Disney front: today 2 of our packages of luggage tags showed up today. Waiting on 2 more. I will say Disney is great about allergies. I sent an email about Drew's peanut allergy. I was mainly concerned about our Pirate and Pal Cruise the first night - lots of peanut type snacks cracker jacks, peanut butter cookies etc. within 3 hours I had an email back from the coordinator of the Cruise. He wanted out our confirmation number and what night we were attending. I was assured that they would make sure there were snacks that Drew could eat - even if they have to bring in special food for him. That is amazing.
Remember something good is going to happen to you today - you jut have to find it.
Wednesday, December 08, 2010
Well the district finally got a home teacher here. tonight she was late. So Drew only had 45 minutes of class time.
I heard back from the State Dept of Education. They are launching an immediate investigation against the district on 6 violations.
Our trip is rapidly approaching. 21 days from right now we should have landed in Orlando and waiting for Phil and Betsy to get there. 22 days from now we should be watching the fireworks from the lagoon on the Pirate and Pals cruise. 23 days from now we will be walking through the Osborne lights at DHS and waiting for New Years. 24 days from now we will have finished the Animal Kingdom park and we will be having dinner at Hoop De Doo Review. Not that I am counting or anything.
Phil and Betsy keep telling me they will be excited after next week. Finals will be over and they will have a life again. If they only knew what not having a life was....
There are so many little things in life that are good. A few not so good but when I look around at everything that others deal with I realize my life ain't so bad. I remind my self every day of the good things in my life -
Remember something good is going to happen to you today - you just have to go find it - what happened to you today?
Friday, December 03, 2010
Tell me if this scenario is rude.
30 minutes before you are to be at your monthly Bunco game your dog gets skunked. You call hte hostess and tell her that your hubby refuses to clean up the dog and you now have skunk on you so you are going to jump in the shower and pick up another member and you will be right over.
When you show up commenting that you can't get the smell out any better but oh well we are all friends and sit down in a cloth chair and proceed to play Bunco. As the evening wears on several people start to get headaches, one gets sick, several go outside to get fresh air,the hostess dining chairs as well as couch now are "Ode DeSkunk". You then can't understand why you were asked to leave because you did shower (not wash your hair)and changed clothes and everyone else is getting sick.
In your opinion was the hostess in the wrong? Or the skunked Bunco Member? I am not the one who was skunked nor was I the hostess this month.
Thursday, December 02, 2010
I hate being seen as a witch (with a b). But sometimes it seems to get peoples attention, after being nice for a month, you have to pull out the big guns to get some ones attention.
I had to do that yesterday. I filed another complaint against the school district. Drew has been enrolled since November 8 in his old school district but has not attended class. Yes you read that right he has not set foot in a class room in a month. While it has been a very peaceful month it has not been too productive. I have called, written letters etc only to get lip service. Yesterday, I had had it. I woke up with a MAD on like my grandma used to say. Once again my letters and calls pleading to get his home/hosptial tutoring going nothing was happening. We were losing anohter week. So I filed the complaint. Served a copy to the district and 2 hours later I got a call. The program specialist told me she was surprised I had filed the complaint since we had been working together. UMMMM.....My son's education under their watch was watching movies and cartoons all day.... that is NOT working together. That is them not doing their job. I hit the roof. I think I have a bit of my sister in me (hi sis) that every once in a while comes to the serface. While I was not proud of my behavior it got the job done.
I charged they had been denying drew his right to a free public education, not following the IEP they wrote, discriminating against him because of his disability. Scott had a very long conference call this afternoon - he did tell the PS it was a good thing I hung up on her because I might have been arrested if I continued on my verbal tirade. We now know where Drew will be attending when we get back from vacation, and why they made the decisions they did. I am currently waiting (still) for a call concerning who will be doing his home tutoring.
That is all I wanted. Was a few explanations on what was happening and why. Not too much to ask. I am just sorry I was forced to take such drastic action to get what could have been very easy to do.
Wednesday, December 01, 2010
I have 2 very different thoughts tonight
1. Never mess with a mama bear when it comes to their cubs and their well being. Elk Grove you really messed up this time.
2.Look at all the stars. You look up and you think, "God made all this and He remembered to make a little speck like me." It's kind of flattering, really. - Tombstone - Morgan Earp.
Can you tell the kind of day I have had?