Sunday, May 11, 2008

when is a mom not a mom

Tonight NBC aird a show naming in their opionion Americas fave mom's. I refused to watch it. Orginally they put adoptive mom's in a category called Non - Mom Mom's. There was an orphanage director (who actually won the category from what I heard) a woman who raised her siblings and a woman according the website had one of her "own" then adopted 6 more children. There are so many myths and un trhuths circulating about adoptive parents that I had a fit. Many in the adopting world sent letters of protest to NBC and the category was changed Friday to Adoptive mom's. Funny thing - Marie Osmond was the host of the show and she herself is an adoptive mom. I bet she thinks she is a real mom. Below is the letter I sent to NBC. As soon as I find an email address for Teleflora they will be getting it as well.

It took me a while to put into words the anger I felt towards your lack of sensitivity to adopted moms. I know the show has aired but I am finally calm enough to put a rational thought together on this subject. First let me say I refused to watch this broadcast. I have children. Some where in the recesses of my mind I seem to remember sitting in front of a judge and him asking my husband and myself if we were aware that by adopting our son we would be responsible for every part of his life, feeding him, clothing him, educating him just like any biological children we had. He asked our other son if he was excited to have a brother (not an adopted brother - a brother) . We all said yes. I have sat up many nights with both my boys thanking God for them. thru every broken bone, asthma attack, nightmare, picture hung on the fridge, excitement of a hot air ballon in the sky, bout of pneumonia, first step, first word, first tooth, first day of school I was there And you know what - my adopted son never called me adopting mommy. He just called me mommy.

which of my kids is adopted - frankly I choose not to say - I am just mom to both of them and always will be. How they came to be does not matter. I bet you would never ask me which of my kids was born by C section or my next door neighbor about the rape that brought her her daughter, or the lady down the sleep if she concieved while on top or bottom during making love with her husband.

The point is how they came to be is not the issue. They are our children and no matter whether they grew in our stomach or our heart they are our children and we are their moms PERIOD.


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